Author: Eric & Elisabeth

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Because He Lives…

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.

Because He lives, All fear is gone.

Because I know He holds the future…

There’s a place out there for us,
More than just a prayer or anything you’ve ever dreamed of.
So if you feel like giving up cause you don’t fit in down here,
Fear is crashing in, close your eyes and take my hand.

We can be the kings and queens of anything if we believe.
It’s written in the stars that shine above,
A world where you and I belong, where faith and love will keep us strong,
Exactly who we are is just enough, there’s a place for us,
there’s a place for us.

When the water meets the sky,
Where your heart is free and hope comes back to life,
When these broken hands are whole again,
We will find what we’ve been waiting for,
We were made for so much more

Narnia Theme Song “There’s a Place for Us”

The kids dressed up in their “Narnia costumes” on Palm Sunday and ran around the Quisqueya school campus shouting “for Narnia…and for Aslan!” I thought about Aslan…about how Christ suffered for us so that we can reign with Him. I thought about where our children are…where we are. 

Haiti. 

And the question we always get…”Is it safe?”

I think about the how and why of so many crazy/good reasons we are here and that the only explanation is that it’s only because of Him. The One who first loved us. 

And “No, He’s not safe. 

But He’s good. 

And He’s King”. 
-Chronicles of Narnia 

I was glad to be reminded of that this week because our weeks have been understatedly hard lately. So this was a really good week to intentionally focus on what Christ intentionally suffered for us at Calvary, and that it wasn’t just about the suffering. It was about hope. That Saturday when all hope seemed lost, hope soon came back to life! But it feels like we have been stuck in the Saturday before Resurrection Sunday for the past two years. Hope is not lost. Just deferred. And our hearts are sick. 


Waiting. Painfully waiting. 

Waiting and trusting. 
Trusting that in that place of pain we will find true fellowship in His sufferings
and the unexplainable joy that is found there. 

I recently read this quote written by a fellow Haiti dweller that totally resonated with my broken spirit. 


“…And as much as I hate that Jesus didn’t power up and come off the cross and “wow” people, or say to his disciples “now’s the time, grab your swords”, or do some spiritual jujitsu …. Once in a while I am grateful that our faith leaves space for Saturdays-the unanswered questions, the impossible hopes, the disappointment and frustration and sense of betrayal. If only for the fact that I can know I am not alone.  
We’re Saturday sorts of people.” 
-Sarah Dornbos


I think we’re Saturday sorts of people too. But we cling to Sunday. 

And so until…

“When the water meets the sky,

Where your heart is free and hope comes back to life,

When these broken hands are whole again,

We will find what we’ve been waiting for…”

Until then…

“Your kingdom come. Your will be done, On earth as it is in heaven.” -Mt. 6:10

 Because He isn’t safe, but He’s good. Because He did not abandon us on that seemingly hopeless Saturday…nor any day since. Because He didn’t leave us alone in this life while waiting for the next. Because we know there is a place for us. Because hope is alive. Because the grave could not hold him. He has risen! He is alive and has given us abundant life.

And we know…

Life is worth the living just because He lives!


“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 
In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the genuineness of you faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at that revelation of Jesus Christ”. 
1 Peter 1:3-7

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KOFAEL

KOFAEL [ko-fi-el]
(KOdinasyon FAmn Endepandan Pou Avansman Lakay)
Cordination of Independant Women for Advancement of the Home

What’s in a name?

I want to tell you all about KOFAEL. Let’s start with the name. In case it bothers you (as it bothered me at first and has seemingly bothered others who have already gone out of their way to point it out), the acronym KOFAEL only loosely follows the Haitian definition. We have decided not to make an acronym out of the English translation which would have begun with “COW…”. Thank goodness I was able to squash that idea by saying that the acronym COW representing a womens organization wouldn’t go over too well with English speakers! So let’s just roll with the Creole version! Loosely following and adapting is what Haitian Creole is all about. However, because I am an English major and prefer to at least loosely follow rules of grammar (and because we strive for a little professionalism), I double checked to make sure we were doing that with KOFAEL. Low and behold it isn’t just a Creole issue. Here’s what I found. “Some acronyms are formed from the first few letters of a word, instead of just the first letter. All initialisms are acronyms, but not all acronyms are initialisms.” Great. KOFAEL passes. No more issues there. But how did we choose the name? We had a list of potential names that went along with the purpose of the organization. KOFAEL was one of several names on the list that the women had suggested at Saturday meetings. These names were turned over to the ASSAIRES (social affairs office) with our application to become an official organization. Social affairs declared KOFAEL as the winner when the paperwork came back to us. We are official! If you understand Haiti even a little, gaining official status through a government office is often quite the ordeal. We are so thankful for the special guy who worked very hard to get this done. 

How did KOFAEL get started?

KOFAEL was birthed in an effort to help women affected by the January 12th, 2010 earthquake in Haiti. Julienne Pierre, a young Haitian university student, began praying about a way to improve the lives of the women she knew would be most vulnerable after the earthquake destroyed their livelihood. She knew many of the women from her church, and from contacts at another church nearby. Her desire was to see these Haitian women come together as the body of Christ to help meet one anothers needs. Julienne began seeking out and visiting with women that were found to have the greatest need. She spent several months collecting data in order to gain knowlege as to where these women were before the earthquake and what they were doing there in contrast with where they are and what they are doing now.
Some of the paperwork collected on the KOFAEL women
Julienne began this process in January of 2011 (one year after the earthquake) when it became evident that promised progress to improve the lives of women like these was going to be tragically slow. The women were desperate. They needed hope to keep going and they needed it NOW. Julienne recruited Franz Osier to help. Frantz also has a huge heart for these women and others in severe poverty situations. He has devoted his life to serving those who are poor and oppressed. Frantz and Julienne don’t have much, but I have watched them give of everything they have because of their love for the Lord and people. I first met Frantz at an orphanage where he works as a pre-K teacher five 1/2 days per week. I know the pay isn’t much, but I’ve seen him spend it on others who have even less. Frantz is a talented young man and speaks four languages well. He has translated for us many times, has tutored us in our Creole lessons and now also tutors our girls in ESL after he finishes teaching at the orphanage each day. We have so enjoyed getting to know Frantz and have learned so much more about Haiti from him as well. If you have come to visit us in Haiti, you have probably met Frantz. He is part of the family now and has informed us that he might have to just move in with us next year after his roomate gets married. We are also plotting how we can bring Frantz back to the states with us for a few weeks so that he can share about KOFAEL and Haiti with others…which he can do so much better than me! 
Frantz and Julienne officially started meeting with the group of KOFAEL women collectively on June 18th, 2011 after collecting information about the women for six months. There was a school drive held October 5th, 201l to benefit the children of the KOFAELwomen. 
Some of the school supplies given by leaders to KOFAEL children on October 5, 2011
Presidential orders did not allow Haitian schools to commence until October in 2011.
We might call it a “drive” but really it was Frantz and Julienne that spent their own earnings to purchase the items for the children of KOFAEL women in order to give them a dose of hope that they would be able to send their children to school. Many are often inclined to just take care of themselves (and for some that is truly all they can do) in this survivalist society. What an encouragement to see two young people like Julienne and Frantz spending their free time and limited personal resources to care for many others. 
Smile of hope after receiving items for her children to use at school.
Frantz and Julienne asked me if I would come to the first November meeting to speak to the women of KOFAEL. Frantz used this as one of my Creole lesson assignments as my first public speaking engagement in Creole. I began to ask many questions about the KOFAEL womens organization and soon began to love these women too. 

Me, Julienne, and my friend Audrey who came to my first meeting with me serving refreshments

Frantz, Julienne and I began to discuss more concrete goals and direction for the future of KOFAEL and the paperwork process that remained to become an official organization in order to better serve the women. We sought wisdom from business professionals who have worked sucessfully in Haiti for decades and began to write a business plan for KOFAEL. We formed a board and got busy to complete the paperwork process for the organization. We included the women in decision making during meetings discussing potential options with them and listening to their critiques which told us which roads they had been down before and what they were for and against…basically what was going to fly and what wasn’t. We didn’t have much to start with but decided we needed to just start. So we started with prayer.

KOFAEL meetings always start with prayer request, praise, and worship.
The women gather for meetings 2 Saturdays per month.
They are required to be present at meetings to remain in the organization.

Next we started with the direction we felt the Lord was leading…with small business loans. The women of KOFAEL are hard workers. Each had her own small business before the earthquake that would provide for her family and pay for her children to go to school. Even though they were poor compared to other standards, they lived with dignity and contentment with the work of their hands. These women really just want to be able to achieve that dignity and contentment once again doing what they already know how to do well. For most of these women it looks like this.

This KOFAEL woman’s trade is to sell bananas.

She also sells things for a living.

In case you are wondering how in the world someone could provide for their family and pay to send their children to private school (there are no public schools in Haiti) by selling bananas and odds and ends on the Haitian street market, you are not alone. I have asked this question many, many times. I know it is difficult to comprehend, but the answer I always get is…”They really can!” I probably wouldn’t believe it if we didn’t personally know street vendors who have been selling things like sodas on the street for years and who never seem discontented, and couldn’t believe we didn’t own a television when they have two in their modest but functionable homes. 
We did throw around the idea of teaching the women a new trade (like making jewelry…but found some of the women actually do already make their own jewelry and sell that too), but that idea was met with much opposition as the women already felt strongly that they were skilled in their trades and didn’t want to start a new thing, just wanted to be able to do the thing they did before the earthquake. They only want to be able to continue to work and grow their business in order to improve the quality of life for their families…most of which are living in deplorable conditions among the thousands still in tent cities. 


So how can we help them?


The last thing my white American self wants to do is try to sweep in and “help” these brave, strong women who I respect so deeply. The last thing I want them to think is that I am going to bestow American blessings upon them to improve upon their lives I couldn’t imagine living. They asked after the first meeting if the blan (foreigner) would be back? I’ve come back and the women may be starting to trust me a little. Other than helping Frantz out with some of the paperwork costs when he comes up short with a deadline approaching, I have contributed very little other than time, counsel, and prayer. I’ve told the women that I will share their stories and that others around the world are now praying for them too. I’ve also encouraged them to trust the leadership of Frantz and Julienne because I’ve seen how hard Frantz and Julienne strive to help them and because I know how much they truly care and intercede on their behalf. I know some of them have asked when the blan is going to do something (because they are desperate) but we have asked them to be patient as we seek the Lord for the best way. We believe the best way to proceed is through small business loans. 

These are among the 18 selected for our first round of small business loans. Here they are filling out the paperwork and signing the contract agreements for receiving and paying back the loan.

Why small business loans?


When we first began to discuss that small business loans would probably be the best fit for this ministry, it was hard for me. It was hard mainly because Eric and I spent many years on the Dave Ramsey plan climbing our way out of financial debt and the word “loan” doesn’t sit well with us now. So it is hard to imagine how giving a loan to women already in slavery to poverty could possibly help them. The last thing we want to do is enslave them further. The next last thing we would want to do is to create dependency. So we started small with a very small 0% interest loan just to see how this would go. Frantz took out a loan himself that would provide 18 of the KOFAEL women with a small business loan equivalent to about $65 U.S. While this amount is more than these women make in a month, it is only a fraction of the $250 it would cost for purchases needed to fully re-start their small businesses. But $65 for 18 women was all we had, and we had to start somewhere. 

Julienne helping some of the women fill out the paperwork for their first small business loan. 

Frantz (standing) and explaining for the 15th time exactly how the loans will work.
The man seated is one of our helpers at meetings. 

How will the loans work?


The women will have 5 months to pay back the $65 loan they received in January 2012. They will not be charged interest on the loan, but are expected to fulfill their payment on time each month. They will use the money to purchase items for their small businesses. They need to show that they can do something with their little and be trusted to pay back their loans before they are given more. This is the agreement. 

Frantz handing out the loan money.

Lifting their loans in praise for this great provision.
I saw many tears of joy on this day.

What’s the next step?


February meeting came and all 18 women who had received the loans made their first payments! There are 40 women in the program and the 22 who did not receive loans have been waiting for their turn. We have set aside the money received from the first round of payments and are ready to use that to grant 10 more women their first $65 loans. Next month Frantz will need to save all the money from the payments to begin payback on the loan he took out in order to begin this process. We are praying for a way to provide beginner loans to the other 12 women. The women who have been coming to monthly meetings at KOFAEL the longest and the ones in the most dire need were the first to receive their loans. 


The first round of women will have paid back their loans in full by June. Our hope and prayer is to be able to provide them with a real business loan of $300 U.S. at this time. $300 x 40 women is $12,000. This is A LOT of money to Frantz, Julienne, and for our family. But we do not believe it is beyond our God, and we believe He cares deeply for these women. We have thoroughly discussed how this could possibly be accomplished and have come up with the following idea. We do not claim to be experts in this and are open to questions and better ideas. Here is our idea. 


40 individual ONE TIME sponsorships of $300 each raised for the women. $250 of this will be to start/improve her small business. The other $50 will be a gift to help her family and encourage her in her new start. The $250 sponsorship will not be a gift for the women, but another 0% interest loan they will pay back within 6 months time. However, it will be a “gift” to the ministry of KOFAEL as a whole. We will recycle the monthy payments made by the women to grant others loans and pay for the minimal operating costs of the ministry so that Julienne and Frantz can also make new starts in their own lives. Our operating costs are minimal, but we do have to pay partial rent on the small building used for meetings as well as continual paperwork fees for the organization. We also spend money on copies for the women, tap-taps (transportation), and drinks (sometimes snacks) for the women at meetings. We will cash flow the sponsorship money to keep KOFAEL going without taking out more loans or continually asking for more money. We will also hold a school supply drive once a year that will benefit the many children represented among the KOFAEL women. We want to continue to encourage the women in their hard work and make sure the children are able to stay in school. Sometimes expensive school supplies are the only thing keeping a child home from school and we see no good reason that this has to happen. We will gladly accept donations of school supplies, backpacks, and shoes for the children to be given out at the fall family meeting/party in August. 


How can you help?


Pray for the KOFAEL women and their families.
Pray about sponsoring 1 or more of the 40 women.
Share about these women with your friends and family.


Current Needs?


We are in need of a person that would have the talent and time to help us create a website or blog for KOFAEL. We have photos and bios on each of the women in the organization and information for the website. I can do the update post as they come for the website but I am looking for someone who can help with this project. If you are interested please contact me by e-mail at eeream@hotmail.com as soon as possible. 


Our other need is to raise awareness and sponsorship commitments before June comes. We are waiting to see what God will do in answering the fervent prayers of the KOFAEL women. Will you be part of that answered prayer that could truly change the life of a woman and her family?


Thank you for taking the time to read this. Please take a few more minutes to pray for these women and the future success of the KOFAEL ministry.


By His Grace,
Elisabeth

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The Latest News…long and overdue newsletter

Ministry Work

Eric teaches  7th, 8th, and 9th Bible classes at Quisqueya Christian School and is also in charge of weekly chapel services. He has 75 students that attend his classes and these keep him quite busy along with his 9th grade discipleship group. 
Students in one of Eric’s classes performing Walk Through the Old Testament
A group of 20 year old college guys have sought Eric out on a weekly basis for discipleship as well. We can count on them to show up on our doorstep each Friday night. They attend an English speaking college nearby where Eric has been invited to speak a few times and has been asked to come as often as possible and share whatever he wishes! These young men desire to grow in their relationship with the Lord and in their English fluency. We use God’s Word to accomplish both! This is also another opportunity for Creole practice in addition to Eric’s Creole class three nights per week. He is now in level 3 and our Haitian friends often comment on how good his Creole is in such a short amount of time!
Elisabeth with 4 of the KOFAEL women
Elisabeth keeps busy attending to the needs of family, hosting all our many houseguests, visiting orphanages and nearby ministries often, subbing and volunteering at school, taking Creole lessons, and working with a grassroots women’s organization called KOFAEL. This ministry seeking to help women affected by the earthquake was started one year ago by two Haitian friends we have come to trust and love. KOFAEL provides small business loans to these women so they can purchase the goods for their little businesses in order to provide for their families and send their children to school. We are in the beginning stages of helping to get KOFAEL off the ground. Elisabeth serves as the only American on the Haitian board for this ministry. Her role is primarily to provide direction, facilitate meetings with those in Haiti who can give sound advice in business matters, help with the translation of documents in English, work on a KOFAEL blog, raise awareness and support, and attend monthly meetings with the women. These women are primarily older women whose husbands are physically incapable of working, widows, and single mothers whose already meager livelihoods were destroyed by the earthquake and who have since been living in tent cities surviving on faith from day to day. It has been a blessing to watch how even the small efforts of KOFAEL have brought them hope and encouragement. We pray that God opens the doors to be able to bless these women with greater sustenance in the coming months.
KOFAEL women praising the Lord for the loans 18 of them received in January.



Family Life
Ethan and his classmate friends
Ethan is our 7 year old 2nd grader who has made an easy adjustment to life in Haiti. Ethan’s favorite thing about living in Haiti is “making lots of new friends”. Ethan has made many new friends from all over the world on the campus of Quisqueya Christian School. He is a little more reserved off campus and is very sensitive to what he sees beyond our security gate. Ethan watches intently, ponders, and asks a lot of “why’s” about other children that do not have the opportunity and privileges that he and his classmates do. Ethan sees and processes these things with the personally painful knowledge that “other children” include his own Haitian sisters whom he loves dearly and prays for daily. Ethan misses his school and friends back in TX and is looking forward to our visit in the summer months. But when asked what other things were his favorites about living in Haiti he said, “that we get to be here for such a long time”. We are thankful that our entire family considers it a blessing to be here and we pray that doors will continue to open for us to be in Haiti for “such a long time”. 
Evan attraction is inevitable wherever he goes.
Evan Daniel, our uninhibited 5 year old (whom we had very little concern about making the transition to Haiti life) says his favorite thing about living in Haiti is “going to school”. Evan started Kindergarten the morning after we arrived in Haiti so he naturally integrates his first school experiences with his first Haiti experiences. Evan preferred to use the outdoor restroom 50% of the time back in TX, and the word “stranger” has never held a lot of weight with him (He’s A LOT like his daddy). 

These and the fact that potential consequences of “wandering off” don’t hold a lot of weight with him either held the bulk of our concern. Elisabeth was very thankful that everyone who understood where we would be living kept asking about how we would cope with “living on a compound”. She would then tell them that a compound is exactly where we need to be (referring to Eric and Evan’s wandering habits)! Our campus compound gives the boys (all 3 of them) the freedom to wander and explore safely and has been a tremendous blessing during our first year of transition. We are also thankful that our campus housing is not situated out in boonies with nothing else around but is right off one of the main streets in the largest city and capital Port au Prince. This allows many ministry opportunities both inside and outside our campus walls. Eric especially makes the most of these opportunities and can often be found outside the gate practicing his Creole gospel with his “machan” (vendor) friends. We are thankful these friendships provide occasions for Creole practice, but realize they also have provided drinking too many cokes.
Eric with his buddies outside our gate!
In return for Creole lessons, Eric keeps them in the coke business. 

Our girls also love to venture outside the gate (though they are never permitted to do so without mom or dad). They love to teach mom all about Haitian street shopping, but mostly they just love feeling free. FYI: (just in case you have recently been introduced to our family) We have been in the process of adopting Elita Marguerite (13) and Esmée (9) from an orphanage in Haiti since February 2010. 
Our Haitian Princesses
Our girls are what first brought us to Haiti opening our eyes and several trips later opening doors for us to move here.  We have cherished precious time spent with our Haiti girls in the past two years and especially the past 5 months. We long for the day that they are permanently in our home and we believe that day will be here very soon! We recently received word that we have an Adoption Decree (meaning that the girls have been legally adopted in Haiti). We are now awaiting for U.S permission to issue the passports and visas. Once the visas are issued we will need to return to the states (since our adoption process took place in the states) and wait for documentation of U.S. citizenship. We are praying that the visas will be issued around the same time that school lets out for the summer months. Should the visas be issued before this time, Elisabeth will have to return to the states with the girls while Eric and the boys complete their teaching/school responsibilities at Quisqueya. We look forward to our return in the summer months in order to complete U.S. adoption paperwork, visit family and friends and Lord willing raise some needed support for our return to Haiti in August.
We have a wonderful church family and abundance of friends here at Quisqueya and surrounding ministries. We have visited several churches nearby several times (we can’t travel far because we usually lack a vehicle), and after 5 months have settled into our growing little Haiti Home Fellowship Church. It doesn’t really have a name but we’ve heard it called that before. It also isn’t really a home church since we don’t meet in a house but at the World Relief headquarters for Sunday service. However, it does feel like we are home when we are there and we are very blessed to be a part of this body.
We do miss family and friends back in the states, but loneliness hasn’t exactly been an issue. In fact, we usually embrace the opposite. Our small house is almost always fully occupied and on the rare occasion it’s not, someone is usually knocking.  We’ve enjoyed hosting many Haiti visitors on a consistent basis (some for a few days, some for a few weeks) since our arrival in September.  We welcome these opportunities to provide hospitality, fellowship, and for others to see another side of life in Haiti. We especially welcome adoptive families visiting their children in Haiti. We have prayed about ways we can give to others adoptions and this is one way we can do this to offset their cost. The long road to a completed adoption in Haiti is mostly a heartbreaking one. We pray for opportunities to provide as much encouragement as possible for fellow adoptive families along the way.

Needs

We praise the Lord for meeting our basic needs thus far and pray for continued provision. Living in Haiti is extremely expensive yet the Lord has provided for us to maintain a very low budget for the time being. However, we are currently short $1,000 per month of our projected needs. We have been able to keep going (praise God for help from family and the sale of Eric’s car back in TX), but have now fallen behind financially the past two months.
Our tight finances will not allow us to consider the purchase of a vehicle at this time, but the need remains. We have been able to use (paying $1 per mile) the school vehicles on occasion and get rides with generous friends the past 5 months. We know the time is drawing near that we will need to have our own ride (and get to be a blessing to others who don’t have one). 
Vehicles are expensive but do not depreciate in Haiti. We have an opportunity to purchase the vehicle of friends leaving Haiti in June. They have a late 90’s model Nissan Safari in good condition, an automatic with 4WD that seats 9-10 and runs on diesel. This is exactly what we need! It would be very difficult and time consuming for us to go through the process of finding another vehicle like this that would meet our needs and we would love to be able to help our friends out by buying it from them!  The cost to purchase this vehicle is around $15,000. We hope to raise this money by June for purchase and so that we can have the summer months to secure the paperwork and insurance documents needed as well (which can also be a time consuming process).
Here is a picture of the vehicle we are hoping to raise the money and purchase in the next 5 months.
It has two rows of bench seats in the very back which allows for up to 6 more passengers.

Prayer request and praise reports

Our greatest heartache and fervent prayer is that the Lord would allow/make a way for our Haitian daughters to leave the orphanage and live with us full time.

We ask that you continue to pray for continued adoption progress for us and for many friends whose paperwork is simply “stuck” in this broken system. Many, many children we know and love are simply waiting with no end in sight. Please pray for these children and their adoptive families to not loose heart or hope during these difficult days.

Pray for the hearts of our Quisqueya students to continue to turn toward spiritual things. Pray that these future leaders will be well equipped, one day leading the country of Haiti in a way that honors the Lord and breaks the cycle of slavery that has been the tragic inheritance of this beautiful land destroyed by greed and corruption.

Pray for the 40 women (representing many children) of KOFAEL. Pray for wisdom in how to proceed in helping them rebuild their lives and for hope and encouragement to reach their suffering hearts.

We praise the Lord and continue in prayer for continued health and opportunities to share the gospel and show hospitality to our Haitian friends and foreigners visiting Haiti.

We praise the Lord for financial provisions and pray for God to lead others to come alongside us for support in 2012.

We praise God for adoption progress and for the blessing of being able to bond with our girls in their own culture, learn more about their country, their language, and in turn understand our Haitian daughters so much better.

Praising the Lord for new renters for our house in TX! Our friends that were previously renting recently had job relocation and told us they would have to move out. A dear friend contacted us (before we even thought about advertising) and said she knew someone that might need to rent our furnished house until at least the summer. God provided!
____________________________
Thank you for your continued prayers and support as we seek to serve Him in Haiti! It is always a blessing to hear how the Lord is working in your lives as well! If you would like to contact us with questions, comments, news, and prayer request of your own, please do so! Our contact information link is listed on the right side of this blog as well as our RCE International mission support info.

Much love from Haiti,
The Ream Family

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Defending the Cause

*Double posting from our adoption blog since this post contains issues we struggle through living in Haiti as well as adoption issues. 



“Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; 

maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed.”
Psalm 82:3

I once had a conversation with someone who had every good intention in supporting an orphange here in Haiti, but who was afraid to ask the necessary questions related to the accountabilty of support already received. This person truly wanted to help the children in need, but did not want to deal with the conflict of making sure it was the children that were actually being helped. When I asked the reason for unwillingness in addressing this issue the response I received was, “because right now God is telling me to just be still and know that He is God”. This did not sit well with me. I believe the honest truth was more like “I am too invested and too afraid of what might happen if I ask that question”.

Don’t get me wrong. I do believe that God asks us to embrace and trust in His sovereignty in all situations, at all times. But I also believe that this verse all too often is taken out of context and used as an excuse to NOT do the right thing. My response was and remains, “What does the word DEFEND in defend the cause of the weak and fatherless mean to you?” Let’s go ahead and talk about what God really is telling from Psalm 46:10. Martin Luther derived the inspiration for the beloved hymn “A Mighty Fortress is Our God” from this very Psalm. We sang that hymn in church on Sunday. It unsettled me enough to revisit that conversation in hindsight, to study Psalm 46:10, and write this post a few days later.

“Be still and know that I am God” is the ending reminder that God is with us (46:11), that He is “our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” (46:1). “Our refuge and strength” can also be stated “our impenetrable defense”. The Psalmist often describes God as a “fortress”.  Fortress = defense/protection from enemy in battle. Verse 9 directly before “Be still…” is “He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two; He burns the chariot in the fire.” Sounds like a battle to me. The next call for stillness is not a preparation for worship, or a call to simply lay low, avoid conflict, and watch God work. It is a warning to PREPARE for impending judgement on the earth. It is an encouragement to those who are on God’s side that even though we are in a war, though trouble awaits, “though the earth be removed” (46:2) that we can rest in the confidence that He is with us, so “we will not fear” (46:2) as we fight His battle…for the battle is the Lord’s, the victory is the Lord’s, the glory is the Lord’s. But we are called to fight, to defend. 

We have been so blessed by the people we know and hear of who take seriously the call of “defending the cause of the fatherless”. We know God is pleased when the hearts of His people are turned in this direction. But what should defending this cause look like? Specifically, what should it look like in a place like Haiti? Sadly, we have seen that all too often the purely motivated desire to defend the orphan is eventually manipulated and corrupted into defending one’s own good intentions/investment. And the cause of the weak and fatherless is not defended. And the rights of the poor and oppressed are not maintained. (Please don’t think I’m speaking specifically to any individual, humanitarian group, church, or adoptive parents. What I am saying is that as a whole intentions to help often backfire in this broken system and we all need to be very aware of that.)

I have been hesistant for a long while to write this post because this is a VERY complicated issue with no easy answers.There is so much we don’t know. But there are a few things we believe strongly. Things that we now do know.

We believe that the existence of orphanages, while tragic, do serve a purpose. We believe this purpose should soely be to serve the children that endured certain tragedy to end up there. We do believe there are“good” orphanages that are doing the best they can with what they have and are serving the children of Haiti. We believe there are far too many orphanages in Haiti (and around the world) that are not doing this. We believe that UNICEF’s efforts to respond have in too many ways not contributed to the wellbeing of the children. We also believe that many efforts of many others (who may believe they are contributing) are not contributing either, but instead hindering the orphans defense. We believe that not every child that is placed in an orphanage needs to be or should be there. We believe that every effort should be made to make sure a child being placed in an orphanage has no better option. We do not believe that “better option” always (or even usually) identifies with street kids, and kids living in tent cities. Because we believe that in most cases it is better to be free. Because a high percentage of the orphanages in Haiti represent conditions likened to prison. We can say these things now because we live here now, and now we see. We know hundreds of kids living in orphanages. We know street kids. We know people who live in tent cities. We know mothers who are deperately trying to keep their children. We know people who are desperately trying to help these mothers. We know children who miss their Haitian families, and wish there was a way for them to stay together. If only a way had been presented. Everyone wants to defend the cause of the children, but shouldn’t part of this “defense” be to maintain the rights of the child’s family? I think of all the times I sat across from a young woman at the crisis pregnancy center and when Eric and I worked in a teen maternity home living with these precious girls 24/7 and sharing in their struggles and sorrows. I remember spending countless hours with them pouring over their options for the future…making sure that they had every resource possible to maintain their right to make the best decision for both mother and baby. I remember a few weeks back when Navilla (our Haitian friend that helps us at our house) came to me begging me to help her friend find an orphanage to place her son. I asked why she wanted to place her son in the orphanage. Navilla said it was because the father of the child had died, and she no longer had the means to care for him. I asked how old the boy was. “Seven”. I thought of my Ethan who is also seven. My mind flashed to the face of the child I birthed who has been with me for seven years whom I love so dearly. I pictured myself in this situation. If my husband died. How could I bear to loose my son too? This is what many mothers in Haiti face every day. If only someone would ask this mother, “what would it take for you to be able to keep your son?” Does she not have any rights simply because she is poor and oppressed? Does the orphanage down the road present her only hope? It could be something as simple as clothes and a backpack for school and $30 per month. Or… that little seven year old boy, much like my own, could end up (if he is “lucky”) in an orphanage. Let’s just say it’s a decent orphanage where the children are fed, bathed occassionally, and get a little schooling here and there. And there are 100 other children. And the chances of a seven year old boy being picked for adoption out of 100 others are very slim. But let’s just say he does get picked after spending a year or two in the orphanage and having some of his paperwork validated for an adoption. Then he waits another 2-3 years for the adoption to process. He has now been away from his mother for 4-5 years though she visits as often as she is able. The boy is now 12. How much of his childhood has he missed while caged inside the orphanage walls? How much has this mother missed of her son’s life because she was simply too poor to feed him? It is always easy to want to help the children. Everyone wants to help the children. But when Navilla came to me with this mother’s desperate plea, all I could think about was that mother. And myself. And how I would feel if I had to give Ethan away to an orphanage because I love him too much to watch him starve. How could I ever be ok with that? 

We obviously believe in adoption too. Though we understand all too well that adoption is born out of often painful and unjust situations like the one just described. We do not believe adoption is always the answer. But we believe that sometimes it is. For our girls and others we know and love and pray for daily…it is. Yet for thousands more who sit in orphanages it is not. And what is their defense? We believe it is ok to wrestle through these things and that the answers may be different from case to case. We greatly admire the courage of adoptive parents trying to navigate through this broken system. We wrestle still. 

The following posts on this subject also include things we believe and things we will continue to wrestle with from different angles. Please read and know that the people writing these have seen and experienced enough battles in this country to know what they are talking about. Please understand how controversial, conflicting, and confusing this issue can be. But if you truly want to “defend the cause of the weak and fatherless and maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed”, wrestling through these things should be where you start.



The following (below) was written nearly a year ago in a blog post by Heather Hendrick, a friend whose family was also working in Haiti. I am including this because after also seeing these things with our own eyes in Haiti, we believe the following questions should always be considered by anyone seeking to adopt and/or support an orphanage here in Haiti (or elsewhere).


“There are a lot of orphans in Haiti, most of them not living in orphanages that keep them clean, fed, and loved.  The babies sit in cages.  Their lives are extremely sad.  And yet adopting from Haiti is a long, expensive, difficult process.  Anyone telling you anything differently is not telling you the truth.  Supporting orphanages here is also tricky.  Making sure you’re connecting to an orphanage that is honest is difficult.  Most orphanages are over-crowded with disturbing ratios of children to caregivers.

Before adopting from an orphanage or financially supporting one, here are some important issues that we would want to talk-through and see proof (like with our own eyes) that these things were also important to the people running the orphanage.  Remember…this is just us…Aaron and me.  You are free to disagree.  We are not recommending any orphanages.  We don’t feel comfortable doing that.  What we are offering are our own thoughts…the questions we would ask if we were in your shoes after living here and seeing some of this in person.

1. What is the ratio of children to nannies?  In baby rooms we like to see a 2:1 ratio (2 children to every 1 caregiver).  With the older kids, that number can be different, but with babies and toddlers, research suggests that those ratios help significantly with bonding issues once children are adopted into forever families.

2.  How does the orphanage handle teams?  Do they allow people to come in week after week to hold babies,  semi-attach to children, and say things like “Oh…I want this one.  I wish I could take you home.” Is there a revolving door of visitors who are encouraged to care for the kids and attach to them, only to say good-bye 5-7 days later?

3.  Are the children’s basic needs met?  Are the kids clean?  Are they fed well?  Are their diapers changed?

4.  What is the orphanage’s protocol for taking new kids?  Do they take any kid, no questions asked?  Or is there some sort of system in place to identify the times when a mother does not want to give her baby away…she just needs some money…some help?  Most of Haiti’s orphans are not true orphans.  They have parents.  We don’t know the answers to any of these issues, but we know this concerns us enough that we would probably not adopt from an orphanage in Haiti that took babies without first trying to help, in some way, the mothers of this country.  In the very least, we would expect a birthmother to be very well educated about the decision she is making as she leaves her child at the orphanage.  As people who have adopted before, once the baby is home, having peace about the birth mother’s decision to place her baby for adoption has been important to us.  We never wanted to feel like we were taking a baby away.  We wanted to know the mother was educated about her decision, offered options, and still chose to place her baby for adoption.  If we did not feel like our adoption agency did a top-notch job at educating our birthmom and supporting her, we would have a lot of nauseous, sleepless nights.


5. Do the people running the orphanage have any training in adoption related issues?  Do they know about RAD and have systems in place within their orphanage to address it and help children begin to heal?  A caution:  Anyone with a big heart can move to Haiti and start a children’s home.  Anyone with some money and compassion can buy a house and fill it with kids.  That does not mean they have a clue about issues these children are facing, or the therapy, and safe-guards that should probably be in place to help restore these kids.  They may have big hearts, but haven’t even read one book about adoption or issues adopted children face and the adoptive parents face.  And then there is always the sad truth that anyone with money and no compassion can move to Haiti and open an orphanage.  Not to be a jerk, but orphans can be big business…no matter what country you’re considering.

6. What training does the orphanage or agency offer to families who are adopting?  Are they honest about what it’s like to adopt a child who has been in an orphanage?  Do they try to prepare you, as best as they can, for the issues that will arise?  Do they discuss the regular, run-of-the-mill adoption issues?  Do they help you understand transracial adoption issues?  Do they try to prepare you for what it is like to adopt a child who has been in an orphanage?

7. Do the people running the orphanage do everything legally?  Just because the people running the orphanage are Christians does not mean that you can assume they are not paying bribes or doing things illegally to adopt kids out of this country.  If we ever sensed that something was not being done legally, we would run for our lives.  I’m not sure how it is that Christians biblically justify moving to Haiti, lying, and paying bribes in order to get what they want or adopt kids out of Haiti, but they do.  Some people will say that being a part of the corruption is the only way to get anything done in this country.  That is not true.  Please be careful.  And if you ever hear missionaries you support joke about breaking the rules here to get what they want will you remind them what Jesus says about corruption, liars, and oppressing the poor? 

If we were adopting from an orphanage in Haiti, those are the big things that we’d be looking for as we considered where to adopt.  If our church back home wanted to financially support an orphanage, we’d only suggest orphanages that were completely open to moving towards these goals (if they were not already meeting those requirements).   For example, maybe an orphanage does not have the money to hire enough nannies…but…they want to do that and would agree to do that if a church supported them.  Maybe they don’t know anything about bonding issues, or how to rehabilitate children who have experienced great loss…but….they are willing and eager to receive training in these areas…that’s what we’d be looking for before giving money to an orphanage here or encouraging others to do so.

And yet the fact remains…there are kids in Haiti who are living in incredibly sad situations.  God commands us to care for them.  That’s never easy.  Caring for the orphan is extremely multi-faceted.  Orphanages are only the tip of the iceberg.  The real issues lie deep…hidden…harder to see or put a finger on.  Dealing with the real issues surrounding orphan care means thinking through why there are so many orphans in this country to begin with.  The problems in Haiti are multi-faceted which means orphan care in this country must be multi-faceted.  In many ways, caring for the orphan in Haiti means caring for the families…the mothers who have no ability to keep their kids.  With that in mind, caring for the orphan could look like adopting, supporting an orphanage, or ministries like Heartline and the Apparent Project who are working to prevent children from becoming orphans.

These kids are real.  They need homes.  There are no easy answers.  The issues are complex.  Trying to figure out how to best care for the orphan may take a lot of time and may not be as convenient as throwing money or a mission team at the situation.  It will most definitely take some research.  It will take asking hard questions.  Caring for the orphan may not be easy or glamorous.  Ask any parent walking through the murky and turbulent waters with an adopted child who is dealing with loss, the inability to connect, abuse, and anger issues.  Yet being involved in what God declares important is always worth it.  Being invited, through orphan care, to be a part of redemption is a beautiful, life-changing, faith building journey.

It’s not easy, but God has called us to jump in, do the dirty work, and care for the orphan.”







And though this world, with devils filled, 
should threaten to undo us, 
we will not fear, for God hath willed 
His truth to triumph through us. 

"A Mighty Fortress is Our God"
Martin Luther

—
Posted By Ream Family to Chosen and Much Loved at 1/26/2012 02:52:00 PM

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Fountains of Hope

It was the morning after January 12th, 2010. I had not yet heard the news about the earthquake that violently shook Haiti the evening before. I woke up and began the routine in what would have been just an ordinary day. I fed kids, everyone got dressed, put on my running shoes and headed to the gym. I had barely punched in my desired speed on the treadmilI when the television in front of me caught my eye. Several news stations on all four screens were showing gruesome earthquake footage from…Haiti. I watched for a few seconds and then the reality began to set in. Haiti? No! Not Haiti! Lord, please! Anywhere but Haiti! 

Two years ago I had never been to Haiti. I didn’t know anyone in Haiti. And I didn’t know much about Haiti. But I had been studying different countries (specifically orphan statistics) and praying hard about where God was leading us to adopt a child/ren. The months prior to January 2010, Eric and I had narrowed down the list to three possible countries. Haiti was at the top of the list. I was beginning to think more and more about Haiti. We had done our research and knew that we met Haiti’s strict adoption requirements. We realized that Haiti was our U.S. neighbor, making trips to Haiti very possible for us. And we knew that Haiti had a lot of orphans. I was beginning to feel like there were children in Haiti that were the children for which we had been praying many years. I was beginning to feel like we had family in Haiti even though I didn’t know their names yet.

I stopped running and just stood on that treadmill staring at the screen for what seemed like an hour. The thought “there will be many more orphans” kept playing over and over again in my head. I knew right at that moment that there were people calling out from under the rubble. I felt like they were calling out to me. January 12, 2010, “the day the earth shook” changed Haiti forever. Although we were not here that day, it shook us too. And we were forever changed. 

I first came to Haiti on April 17th, 2010. The graphic pictures I had watched from the treadmill and almost every day since came to life the moment I stepped out of the airport onto the streets of Port au Prince. It had been three months since the earthquake. But the gravity of what happened that day was still all around, inescapable. Hopelessness hung in the air. The homeless were everywhere.

This is the first picture I took shortly after we left the airport on April 17, 2010.

Tents and more tents…everywhere. 

Tents were on every corner of the city. 

The sidewalks were covered with tents. 
There were even tents in the medians of the road. 

And sometimes you can see inside the tents. 
And its hard to see hope there.

I made five trips to Haiti in 18 months and on the last one, we stayed. 
We saw more and more of Haiti. We saw more and more tents…in the city
…in the country.

There are tents still.

And brokenness everywhere.

But today, in a few places where there were once tents you won’t see tents anymore. You will see this. It is a beautiful sight. When we arrived in Haiti only four months ago there were tents covering the area where this fountain and another like it now stand. The homeless that were here now have homes. Two years later as we remember January 12, 2010, we do see these glimpses of progress, and hope hangs in the air. There are still tents all around us, but there is hope too. And where there is hope, there is life. We pray we will see many more fountains of life spring up in 2012. 
“For with You is the fountain of life; 
In Your light we see light.”
Psalm 36:9